Posts Tagged: dog

Our puppy becoming increasingly interested in my boyfriends phone.

Happy Holidays, bitches!

Happy Holidays, bitches!

Lookit this adorable little mother fucker! <3

Lookit this adorable little mother fucker! <3

Puppy adventures!

Chillin&#8217; with the little nig nog!

Chillin’ with the little nig nog!

"Rise and shine, daddy!"

Our puppy loves to wake up my boyfriend and I.

"Rise and shine, daddy!"

Our puppy loves to wake up my boyfriend and I.

Actual photo of me showering.

Actual photo of me showering.

This silly little puppy thinks the Ed, Edd &#8216;n&#8217; Eddy theme song is his daddy whistling for him!

This silly little puppy thinks the Ed, Edd ‘n’ Eddy theme song is his daddy whistling for him!

We have the cutest Jack. Ever. Fact.

We have the cutest Jack. Ever. Fact.

She&#8217;s always watching.

She’s always watching.

This little girl was afraid to take a bath :)

This little girl was afraid to take a bath :)

This dog has been sleeping on my lap like this for at least an hour.
How is this in any way comfortable?!

Text

Dear dog,
If I walk by and you don’t move and you’re breathing slower than uphill molasses, I will poke you until you wake up. Do not give me that distasteful look, I am only concerned for your well being. Just sayin’.

So my dog ran out the door and I panicked because she could get lost and I ran out to go get her but she was no where to be seen. I looked under the porch and behind the cabin and couldn&#8217;t find her. 
Then I hear the jingling sound of her dog tags. I go back inside and she&#8217;s sitting there breathing and being fat. 
Apparently she only went on to the porch and then back inside after I ran out. I think she was just trying to make me exercise. Cheeky little bitch.

So my dog ran out the door and I panicked because she could get lost and I ran out to go get her but she was no where to be seen. I looked under the porch and behind the cabin and couldn’t find her.
Then I hear the jingling sound of her dog tags. I go back inside and she’s sitting there breathing and being fat.
Apparently she only went on to the porch and then back inside after I ran out. I think she was just trying to make me exercise. Cheeky little bitch.

Text

Imagine yourself running blindly through a dark, cold forest. You are being pursued by a pack of wild dogs. They’re hot on your tail. You can feel their warm breath on your calves. Suddenly, you trip over an uprisen root. You fall. You whirl around. You see them charging at you. It’s a pack of Jack Russell Terrier puppies.